How to get over depression/cutting yourself without telling your parents?
Feb.16, 2010 in
Questions & Answers
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I’m 14 and I can’t stop cutting myself, nobody knows that I’m depressed, but one of my teachers thought that i might be and told my school administrator who in turn told my parents, and they yelled at me. So i don’t want my parents to know about cutting myself, I’m sad most of the time, with some brief periods of happiness, but they quickly go away. I tend to think about some things a lot, and always end up making it sad without trying, I cry to myself a lot, and don’t know what to do
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despite what everyone else on here says… i agree with you, i don’t think you should tell your parents. judging from their first reaction, they sound exactly like my parents. im 18 and have been dealing with severe depression/cutting and a few other things for the past 6 years. they once discovered that i cut.. they yelled at me like never b4 (one of the worst days of my life), then they told me to stop cutting. i stopped for about a week and have been doing it ever since. over time the cutting has got less and less. i suppose for me, it is something that will eventually just sort itself out… but i know that’s not the case with most people. i would suggest seeing your doctor.. its confidential and you parents will never have to know. perhaps they could prescribe you some anti-depressants. my parents still to this day seem to think that im the only one to blame for my depression and that im ‘doing it on purpose’, i have tried to explain to them that it is a serious medical condition, but they refuse to accept it. parents might never understand what your going through, but there always helplines, councilors or close friends or family that perhaps might be worth while talking to. hope i helped
You sound like your having depression and having major trouble. You need to get help immediately. You are harming yourself and sounds like it isn’t getting any better. You can go to a mental health center or to an emergency room – or your pastor…just get help – the sooner the better – even tonight. I’ll be praying for you. Good luck and don’t give up … things will get better. Your parents may be afraid and that is why they yelled at you – but that doesn’t help either. Just GO and get help!
As far as the cutting, it’s really a ritualistic thing. I had a problem with that myself. I started to doing other things instead of cutting. It may seem a little strange but try drawing on yourself, holding ice or snapping a rubber band against your wrist. The ice and the rubber band still provide a level pain but the marker from drawing still gives the sensation of seeing the pain. It’s really tough and very easy to slip up. If you slip up once don’t fret, just keep trying it again. And every time you cut try to figure out why you’re doing it and why this time is worse. Make that a requirement and eventually you’ll figure out what’s triggering your feelings. I hope this helps a little bit, I really relate to what you’re going through and know how hard it is. Best of luck to you.
I was exactly the same way a week ago, unfortunately I told my parents and they were understanding… I am a burner, I have cut a few times, but I mostly burn myself now. I am going to get therapy. I have severe depression. I want to be dead.
The only way I could think of is to tell someone, your parents, a counselor, anyone… You need help, what is getting me to stop is thinking about the scars. I am so embarrassed about it. I have to go to gym everyday too.
I wish I could help you. Please just be careful and don’t do anything life-threatening.
I can’t believe your parents yelled at you…that’s horrible. It’s like parents who yell at their child for being gay or yell at them for dating someone of a different race. Don’t they understand that depression is an illness? If you can’t talk to your parents, then talk to the teacher who noticed your depression. Tell them that you are depressed, but that your parents yell at you for it. That teacher could help you get help for your illness.
Stop cutting you self there is no reason to do that to your self and the scars will last forever.
Try getting a psychiatrist it might sound dorky but they work. I had one they are not as bad as you might think.
You can add my Yahoo or even my msn if you have one I’m there for anyone who needs it.
Try not to think about the things that make you cut or get sad think of happier things, like your friends and how much you know they love you
And you might want to go to the Doctor for depression, I get that way sometimes to I call it RDD or Random Depression Disorder. don’t worry its not real… yet.. XD
remember if you need someone add my yahoo or msn..:)
Hannah,
I would really like to tell you how to overcome this but I can’t I have struggled with it …and still sort of am. I tried hard to stop at one point but then I started resulting to alchol…I was off alcohol for a year and a half …but now I’m back and forth with alchol and cutting and it’s on and off. The ice and rubberband that the guy a couple of answers above me help alot! But you have to get over the need to feel that pain. try expressing your emotions through writing, art, or any other way. That’s what helped me get as far as I am now. I havent cut in 2 months and I haven’t drank, for emotional reasons in 4. I hope this helps.
There is much involved in this. Depression is a serious matter.
I would say first find an adult you can speak about this with. This I can promise. There are adults who understand and who are willing to help you. Find ones who have knowledge of this. They will direct you to the right source.
It is to bad you are not comfortable with your parents and feel you cannot speak with them. They themselves probably have very little knowledge of depression. This maybe why they yelled at you. There are many who see depression as a weakness and expect others to just get over it.
Second and I am sure this is very hard for you. It is hard for adults. Tell someone what it is you tend to think about a lot.
May you find Peace my young friend.
*IF YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF EMO DON’T READ THIS*
if you consider yourself an actual person, do.
i’m 13 and i have the same problem.
my mom’d yell. and cry. and blame me.
my advice is to get someone to talk to that’s NOT your parents.
like friends… yeah, see, i have none. but try to find friends to talk to and they’ll cheer you up : )
also.. try music… not the depressing kind i like, i mean happyish music that also doesn’t sound like sh*t.
as for cutting, just try really hard not to.
i started cutting when i was like 11 and stopped when i got so paranoid i would wear 2 feet long socks in the middle of the summer (i cut my leg) and every time my leg would bump into something blood would trickle down…
so just remember what hell cutting is and slowly make yourself stop. i know how hard it is, believe me. but i still have the scars and probably always will. that definetly helped me quit.